December 20, 2007

It's a hard work...

I had always known that I was attracted to men, but because gayness was outside what I had been taught to expect, I wasn't able to accept my sexuality for a long time. Being a single father is probably a bigger issue than being a gay father. It's hard work being the only responsible parent, having to take all the decisions and trying to meet all their needs, but I've been very lucky in terms of having supportive friends and family.I was quite a conventional dad - quite strict with homework, manners and bed times. You need so many skills and resources, but more than anything you need commitment. But I always found the resources to keep going, though it's often been hard. As I grow older I've become much more laid-back and accepting - less controlling. It's been a hard work, but I wouldn't have missed any of it. Like all parents, I made mistakes. I wish to spent more time with my daughter while she is little.
I never lie about what I am. I'm completely comfortable and happy with that, and I just don't know why it has to be a problem. Most people accept me and judge me by what they see, but there's still a minority who are blinded by prejudice. My mother was desperately upset when I first told her, but she got over it and she's the best mum and grandmother in the world. I have a sister, who is always fine about my sexuality, but on the other hand she hates it and still wishes I was 'straight'. The neighbours are fine - we'll never change attitudes or help people understand if we don't have proper education about it.

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